What is this, some elementary school?
Hey free banana is a free banana
You have been promoted to junior assistant manager, acting.
Free banana and a promotion? Noice
Oh my sweet Summer child
What, does it actually cost money?
Your soul
That has been sold a long time ago, the banana is just extra
“I may not have a soul, but at least I’ve got potassium!”
Hell yeah
I hate bananas. So thanks a whole fucking lot, boss.
If you don’t like banana, you’re free to pick any of the fruits listed.
What about a pack of 1989 Batman Movie trading cards?
I’m sorry, they’re 34 years out of date you can’t have any.
Paperclips?
Back to work. Also your toilet privileges have been withdrawn for spending too much time in there on company time. Have a nice day.
how big is the banana? what am I supposed to use to measure the banana? banana is the scale! I need answers!!! why is this happening to me!!!
The banana is 1:1 scale.
A banana, so you can go fuck yourself
Last year at my warehouse they gave us all half a cookie in appreciation of all our hard work… I keep wondering when we will get the other half. They pay us a really good wage so I don’t mind if it’s Bananas or half a cookie.
Must be from the place with all those monkeys on typewriters. This is where they write the Marvel movies.
Relevant story time:
One time, as a warehouse manager, I wanted to get the overnight shift some fruit to snack on during the shift. We had like 100 people there. So I drove to a grocery store at like 11PM and bought pretty much all of their fruit. The cashier was extremely confused. Also, I drove a mini Cooper so it was absolutely packed floor to ceiling with apples, oranges, bananas, and some other stuff.
I didn’t want to carry it all in so I drove my car into the building at the start of the shift.
So my hundred or so employees show up to work then see me rolling into the building with a mini Cooper just bursting at the seams with fruit. It was a fun way to start the night for everyone.
Thank you for making the company thousands of dollars today. Here is 11 cents
My last job had a “wonky” fruit subscription for us to grab. Took home a whole pineapple once.
They also treated us like people and paid a living wage… But PINEAPPLE!!
Now the real question is did you eat it, or do the “Renaissance/Victorian Era” European thing?
What’s the thing? Did they wear it as a hat to show how rich they were, being able to afford a pineapple?
Kinda. They held pineapple parties and used them as the centerpieces. I don’t think they ate them, but maybe they did.
Sounds like a lovely workplace ngl
How does that even happen? Did the pineapples go on discount that week and Dave from accounting thought “why not”?
It was a subscription from a company we already bought from, they sold fruits and veg that weren’t pretty enough for supermarkets, but were great for cooking, baking, and in our case, brewing. Most of the times it’d be apples and citrus, but one box had a whole pineapple. I was the last one out that day and no one had taken it… So PINEAPPLE!
Sometimes they put them on sale for $1 and then I find myself with a whole pineapple sitting around in my kitchen so yeah I think you’re spot on with that theory
Don’t forget to bring a lawyer to the food court, if you want the banana that is.
Funny but I don’t think it fits the sub
I don’t particularly fancy the taste of bananas but I still eat them occasionally because I appreciate their nutritional value.
I wish that the Gros Michel variety of banana could be grown outside of select greenhouses. If you’ve ever had banana pudding, or artificial banana flavoring, you know what a Gros Michel tastes like. If you want to have a banana that tastes that good though, they are an average of $96 a bunch. Cavendish bananas may look nice, but they have no flavor. I personally don’t care for them or Misi Lukis.
I don’t want to get banana breath, thank you.
This is especially funny for me because here, in India, “getting a banana” means you got nothing / got fscked over :)
