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@[email protected] to Microblog [email protected]English • 1 year ago

Take the day off, it's Mother's Day

i.ibb.co

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Take the day off, it's Mother's Day

i.ibb.co

@[email protected] to Microblog [email protected]English • 1 year ago
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  • @[email protected]
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    64•1 year ago

    i’m also curious what the pornhub traffic / stats are for today. feels weird to jerk off today. just like on thanksgiving. father’s day not great either.

    • Fubarberry
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      18•1 year ago

      Probably a good day for Mom related content.

    • @[email protected]
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      10•1 year ago

      Yeah, but think of all the step moms stuck in dryers…

    • @[email protected]
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      81•1 year ago

      Bro your dad is literally going to eat and rail your mom later and you think it is weird to whack one off today?

      • @[email protected]
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        16•1 year ago

        More like his mom is going to get his dad to give her the bidness

        Source : I made my own milf and she wants dick.

        • @[email protected]
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          13•1 year ago

          I made one too and she just wants sleep and for me to clean the house.

          • @[email protected]
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            5•1 year ago

            oof, one of them sex negative feminists.

            Nah, joking aside, different people want different things at different times. I spent time with the baby and cleaning the kitchen etc as well.

    • @[email protected]
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      9•1 year ago

      Felt fine to me ;)

  • @[email protected]
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    4•1 year ago

    Correlation is not causality

    • @[email protected]
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      11•1 year ago

      /woosh

  • @[email protected]
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    11•1 year ago

    I was tempted to get back into shoplifting yesterday morning when I went to the grocery store to get flowers and saw the prices. If I could have jammed that vase into my back pocket, I probably would have tried it.

    • @[email protected]
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      5•1 year ago

      Seriously! Shoulda saved up all my shopliftings instead of wasting them all years ago when everything was already cheap!

      I got crime FOMO

  • @[email protected]
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    24•1 year ago

    Big if true!

    Can anyone find a study on this?

    • @[email protected]
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      54•1 year ago

      Snopes is a buzz kill.

      https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/mothers-day-crime/

      • @[email protected]
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        16•1 year ago

        So not only was it false but:

        The Twitter user told us that he deleted the original joke after he become “educated on the topic of mothers who are imprisoned and the affect that has, not only on them, but their families.”

        😬

        • @[email protected]
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          5•1 year ago

          affect

          • @[email protected]
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            5•1 year ago

            [sic]

      • @[email protected]
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        23•1 year ago

        Guys, the moms have compromised Snopes.

        • @[email protected]
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          17•1 year ago

          Relevant xkcd

        • @[email protected]
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          6•1 year ago

          How deep does this go??

      • @[email protected]
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        16•1 year ago

        A more interesting statistic to me is that police are the least likely to respond properly to a crime when it’s raining.

        • @[email protected]
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          8•1 year ago

          It is stupidly easy to distract a pig if you want to do crime. Rain, snow, a new blizzard at DQ… they are barely trained armed gang thugs, ACAB.

          • Johanno
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            5•1 year ago

            ACAB is a bit too broad of an insult.

            Let’s specify this:

            Most cops in America are bastards -> MCIAAB

            Since in Europe the police is generally better than in USA but still not perfect:

            A lot cops in Europe are bastards -> ALCIEAB

            • @[email protected]
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              4•1 year ago

              Rolls right of the tongue

            • @[email protected]
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              3•1 year ago

              You’re missing the point of ACAB. All cops are either bastards or they tolerate and join ranks behind the ones who are actually bastards - making them bastards as well. Whistleblower cops are not bastards, but they end up not being cops any more and often not being alive any more.

              • @[email protected]
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                1•1 year ago

                because its a stupid ass point from a outside point of view.

                every good or neutral person joining is a win compared to a truly awful one that could have taken the spot instead.

                its just the same old bland black and white tribalism.

  • Cowbee [he/they]
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    1•1 year ago

    Bless all Moms!

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