• Capt. Wolf
    112•7 days ago

    *puts in coins and pushes button for Crystal Bepis, gets diet root beer*

    *puts in coins and pushes button for Bepis this time, somehow receive trail mix, not in bag*

    *Accidentally put in too much money, return button doesn’t work. Push any soda button, nothing happens. Next guy gets two sodas he actually pushed the button for.*

        • LousyCornMuffinsEnglish
          22•6 days ago

          I once found a vending machine where I could pay for skittles, it wouldn’t give them to me, I’d get a refund, then I’d pay for them again and get TWO SKITTLES. I keep that location to myself but it was a godsend.

          • Capt. Wolf
            14•6 days ago

            The SCP Foundation is a secret organization dedicated to securing, containing, and protecting various anomalous entities. The website is an archive of top secret documents including entries for each entity, called an SCP followed by a number, containing a practical name, detailed description, the effects of the anomaly, experiments performed, containment methods, pictures, etc. Objects can be anything, benign looking household items, monsters, seemingly normal humans, etc. There’s nearly 5000 entries on the site. It’s a pretty fun time sink if you’re into short horror stories. Most of them only take a minute or two to read. There’s also multiple games, most notably SCP Containment Breach and tons of spinoff material.

                • @[email protected]
                  2•6 days ago

                  Oh I didn’t reckon it was even related, just meant the same flavor - but very very interested knowing control is based on SCP

              • Capt. Wolf
                7•6 days ago

                Exactly, it literally says in Control’s wiki, “inspired by paranormal stories about the fictional SCP Foundation.” I didn’t know the genre is now called “New Weird” though. I have some new authors to check out.

          • socsaEnglish
            5•6 days ago

            A creative writing project where the stories are all loosely based in a common universe where there is a secret organization protecting humanity from an evil force which manifests as a broad variety of different monsters.

          • @[email protected]
            3•5 days ago

            come up with a weird supernatural concept and write it in the format of a lab report

            SCP-80085
            Special Containment Procedures: put it in a secure room and don’t fucking touch it.
            Description: SCP-80085 is a McTasty burger as served by the McDonald’s restaurant chain, seemingly immune to rot and decay. Anyone who touches it fucking dies instantly from clogged arteries causing a heart attack.
            Addendum: Somehow Steve survived touching the burger, he took a bite and fucking exploded when he swallowed it, holy shit that’s gonna take some therapy. Burger seems to have regenerated though.

  • @[email protected]
    36•6 days ago

    There’s a soda machine in seattle on the sidewalk of some random street not near any store, that someone stocks with random cans of whatever. Stuff I would have bet money doesn’t exist, sometimes. Never heard anyone mention it, but when I brought it up they were like “oh yeah that haunted vending machine.”

  • @[email protected]
    24•6 days ago

    They’ll also never understand the pleasure of finding a dusty machine like this on a hot day after biking a long distance, putting in a quarter and being shocked when it works(!) and the sodas are ice cold.

    • iltoroargento
      34•6 days ago

      I love the kind of woman that will actually just kill me. You know, when I left the house today I was thinking “Damn, I really hope some hot chick paints my brains all over some fucking hallway.” And here we are.

      I mean, really, just absolutely destroy me. I’m talkin’ full on, watermelon in the thighs level carnage.

      And I want it to scare the shit outta me. I mean I hope I piss myself. I hope I piss myself and you call me your little “peepee pisspiss boy.” I want you to fuck me up. I mean I want you to make me your bitch. Your little peepee piss myself bitch.

      I want it to get embarrassing. I mean like… weirdly embarrassing. Unsanitary, too. We should be entirely different people, by the end of the first eight hours.

      Do you understand what I’m trying to say here? I mean, l’m a real freak. I’m not normal.

      Ma’am… Please… You have to crush me.

      Edit: Link

        • @[email protected]
          3•5 days ago

          I think I single handedly killed it. I bought like seven two-liters a week for years, and I stopped last year when I switched to caffeine free diet bepis. Then Diet Rite gets cancelled. I’m sorry, guys!

          I liked diet rite because it mixed well with various flavored syrups (Monin), especially vanilla and cherry.

            • @[email protected]
              3•5 days ago

              Lots. Especially if you include the ice in the soda! But yeah. Usually six to eight cups additional. My fridge meters out filtered water by quarter cup increments, so I can keep good track of it.

              • @[email protected]
                2•5 days ago

                I hate ice in my soda. Takes up space that should be soda.

                But I’m glad you get your water intake