• partial_accumen
    link
    fedilink
    15814 days ago

    Every year the government takes 1 hour away from every American with the implementation of Daylight savings time. They return the hours to each American in the fall. However, in between March (when the hours are taken) and November (when the hours are returned) over 2 million Americans die, and don’t get their hours returned to them, or their estates. This happens every. single. year.

    What is the government doing with all of these stockpiled hours of dead Americans?

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      3814 days ago

      Before people started measuring time, a day was a day. People worked when they felt like it and stopped before it got dark.

      When we started quantifying time, it didn’t take long before time suddenly became a commodity. All of a sudden bosses would pay by the “hour”, and no longer by what they got in return.

      Then, they started regarding the hours that they paid for as “theirs”, demanding workers to keep breaks short or peeing in bottles.

      /Rant

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        3114 days ago

        I love when I see stuff like this online. As if farming is some luxurious fun time denied us by corporations.

        I lived in a subsistence farming community in West Africa for a couple years. Farming isn’t easy or fun.

        People woke up before the sun every.single.day to go tend to the fields. They stopped working when they were exhausted from being out in the sun all day, or when they were finished with the field. The crops and the weeds grow when they want, not when you want.

        If it didn’t rain enough, they might starve, or their children might starve. Maybe both. The backbreaking farm labor was literally a gamble with their lives. Occasionally someone would get whacked by a tool and have to ask friends and relatives to farm their crops for them, often at a cost of some of that grain later. If that injury got infected, there’s extra days or weeks you’re asking someone else to do extra work to cover for you, and you owe them for this.

        Everyone harvested crops at about the same time, flooding the market. But people also didn’t just want to eat millet alone and wanted things like cooking oil or salt they had to buy. So being strapped for cash, they were forced to sell a lot of harvest up front because they simply couldn’t afford to wait any longer for basic needs.

        I can go on and on, but if you think being a farmer is so wonderful and amazing, I would encourage you to go do some WWOOFing and spend a few months on a farm and actually doing a real farmer’s schedule and not some up at 9, done at 2:30 schedule.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          913 days ago

          I don’t think they said farming was fun, and I’m also not sure that you lived on a farm “before people started measuring time” 🤷🏾‍♂️

      • fmstrat
        link
        fedilink
        English
        213 days ago

        All brains should aspire to work like your brain.

    • console.log(bathing_in_bismuth)
      link
      fedilink
      English
      614 days ago

      Those two million all happened to be born after daylight savings time but before the hours are returned. So they get to live with an extra hour.

      When they die it cancels out thus the Big Time Bowl doesn’t overflow or run dry.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    1013 days ago

    I think something cataclysmic happened during the Younger Dryas period and we may never know what but it’s not coincidence there are multiple flood myths that evolved independently. Also, I think humans have been around longer than we realize and we’re in another iteration of the same course of evolution waiting to get out of our Fermi loop.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      Deutsch
      713 days ago

      Well, concerning the floods: flooding is still really bad and usually affects a huge area. Normally it is not like one village floods and everybody dies and the next village is completely fine. So, for people who do not get around a lot it might feel like the whole world was flooded. Then maybe they hit a few bad years in a row, and BAM, God or somebody wants to punish humanity story confirmed.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        413 days ago

        True but in parts of the world completely isolated from others? India in comparison to South America as an example.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          Deutsch
          313 days ago

          Especially then. How would the ancients in India know that South America even exists? It floods in India, story develops. It floods 300 years later in South America, story develops. For all they knew, it was the whole world that flooded. They could not check back, whether it flooded on different continents.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    100
    edit-2
    14 days ago

    That NASA has done a zero-gravity intercourse experiment.

    The 50th shuttle mission had married couple and it included spacelab. A pressurized and habitable module that could be isolated from the rest of the crew. Even before launch they were asked if it would happen, and denied it, as NASA has afterwards as well.

    It doesn’t help that several of the listed experiments was about human health, developmental biology and included animals and eggs to study ovulation, fertilization, cell division and growth.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      3214 days ago

      Now that you bring it up, of course we’ve studied whether babies can be made in a spaceship. It’s literally the only other option for interstellar travel besides cryogenic freezing, which is far more sci-fi than spacesex. Or spacex for short.

      • Angry_Autist (he/him)
        link
        fedilink
        914 days ago

        Any generational ship will mutiny within one generation and likely die off by the second

        Interstellar travel is a pipe dream made up by people tired of saving what we already are losing

          • Angry_Autist (he/him)
            link
            fedilink
            813 days ago

            We can’t even keep the most prosperous nation on the planet from falling to fascism in 5 years how the FUCk do you think we’re gonna keep an isolated crew of highly intelligent people with access to the highest tech available?

            I know enough about human nature that the only way this works is if it started as a die-hard authoritarian religious movement and even then I only give it 1 out of 4 chances of making it 100 years into the mission

            • @[email protected]
              link
              fedilink
              113 days ago

              Transitional periods take time, and are generally pretty messy. Most of that is because comfortable humans are inherently lazy. The rich managed to stave off a transitional period that began in the mid 1800’s for almost a century with specific concessions to the working class, that they immediately started clawing back, after WWI and WWII. They can’t hold it back with neoliberal rot anymore, so the transitional period may now continue.

              It will get better, just maybe not within our lifetimes.

              • Angry_Autist (he/him)
                link
                fedilink
                112 days ago

                Most of that is because comfortable humans are inherently lazy.

                This is classist propaganda and doesn’t belong in your message

          • Angry_Autist (he/him)
            link
            fedilink
            112 days ago

            You really don’t want to go down that line with a guy on the spectrum that has spent literally half a century thinking about space travel. You really don’t.

  • Lemminary
    link
    fedilink
    1613 days ago

    Eipstein didn’t kill himself.

    I mean, the stakes seem pretty low right now.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    2413 days ago

    Paul McCartney died in a car crash in 1964 and was replaced by someone who turned out to be a way better song writer.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    3013 days ago

    Companies add water to meat to make it heavier so they can charge more.

    I once left a pound of frozen ground beef from the farmers market in water but the packaging was damaged, so it was watery. I patted it dry with paper towels. Months later I bought ground beef from a store and it felt like the watered patter dry beef. I even dried it using 2 paper towels afterwards…

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      1313 days ago

      This is 100% true. Have had a supermarket GM tell me about how much water they ‘had’ to pump into corned silverside to meet a price point.

      • Nomecks
        link
        fedilink
        4
        edit-2
        11 days ago

        A company in Canada, Lilydale, used to market their chicken as “no water added”

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      412 days ago

      Frustrating if true, since I’ve heard several people float the same conspiracy while shopping in my store, despite this not being something that we do. The price of meat (at least in Canada) has just risen to absurdities post-pandemic. I don’t even buy it anymore.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        2
        edit-2
        12 days ago

        Typically it’s not the chain that sells it. It is the processor before it gets to the store, think of the prepackaged meats with the weight stamped on a sticker. Or even bulk bags of parts.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          212 days ago

          My parents have a local butcher in town. It’s about half the price of the supermarket and excellent quality.

          • @[email protected]
            link
            fedilink
            211 days ago

            I was talking about large producers like Tyson or Foster Farms adulterating their products.

            Your family is in a completely different league than them. I say this as someone who grew up splitting a cow from the farm with family members and having a local butcher do the work of splitting it into parts.

            I bet the sausage they make is amazing!

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      713 days ago

      I have seen videos of the machines injecting water into shrimps (lots of needles), this isn’t a conspiracy theory!

      A similar thing is fat; force-feed cattle quickly and they get a big lump of fat (it will just melt away, but you still pay for it), feed them normally and exercise them and the fat will be in “stripes” and makes the meat taste way better.

  • Lovable Sidekick
    link
    fedilink
    English
    17
    edit-2
    13 days ago

    Pillsbury pie crusts - the kind that come rolled up, 2 in a box, come in a very standard box with the typical two big flaps at the end, one glued over the other, with two little side flaps inside. Safeway store brand pie crusts seem identical but have a slightly more complicated box. One flap peels open easily but the other flap is sort of latched into the little side tabs with little slots, making it hard to peel open. You have to rip the corners apart. It’s totally unnecessary. The simpler Pillsbury box works fine.

    Until just now my low-stakes conspiracy theory was that the store brand box was deliberately designed to create the disadvantage of being a slight pain in the ass to open. I figured Safeway pie crusts, like most store-brand products, are made by a major manufacturer - probably Pillsbury - and that Pillsbury probably made them under the condition that the package be harder to open, to create a tangible difference between the products.

    However, when I started typing this I casually googled and found that Safeway buys their OEM pie crusts from Albertsons. This blows my conspiracy theory but now I wonder even more why the box design is so stupid.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      English
      613 days ago

      Safeway and Albertsons are the same company (and randalls and tom thumb and about 20 other names). Lots of acquisitions and mergers over the years.

      so the real question is where albertsons gets their pie crusts from.

      • Lovable Sidekick
        link
        fedilink
        English
        513 days ago

        I srsly doubt that the Pillsbury box design is still under patent, because it’s been used in hundreds or even thousands of products I’ve opened over a span of decades - for example, pretty much every breakfast cereal box works that way. Two main flaps, two little tabs under them at the ends. The store-brand box is something I’ve never even seen before. Could be that it’s designed to be opened along one side, with the “front” of the box opening as a lid. Then the structure would actually make sense. I dunno, next time I make pie I’ll have a closer look.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          413 days ago

          I don’t know what I was thinking when I read your original comment, but I thought you meant the ones that come in the tubes. Guess I was half asleep. The extra tabs on the corners sound like they might be for structural support so that they don’t get crushed as much when shipping or so that the box they come in can be weaker. I know plenty of the ones with the basic glued design open up on their own when weight is put on it.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      312 days ago

      Pillsbury probably put money into R&D for their box design and the Safeway white label company is probably using a box design that is older, made by older machines with lower tolerance for mistakes and cheaper glues. Manufacturing engineering is a very interesting field with a lot of budget concerns.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    38
    edit-2
    14 days ago

    Okay I think Amtrak is not really remotely interested in providing a positive passenger rail experience, but is instead used by the automotive and railroad industry to provide a poor experience, ensuring that people keep buying cars and gas and keep the rail lines free for commercial usage.

    Here is my primary piece of evidence; in e-commerce web design to increase sales your goal is to remove barriers between a motivated customer and them clicking buy. A company the size of amtrak should have a decently sophisticated process of multi variable testing and focus groups to at least someehat improve the process over time and make it easy for people to plan route trips and buy tickets.

    And yet in the decades that Amtrak has been operating they user experience has barely changed and seems to do just the minimum to keep up with the times and not look stale. And it’s not an overly complicated item they are selling. A very small in house team would be able to make a very usable experience in just a couple of years. But it’s absolute shit. It’s so frustrating and to try and plan a train trip and it always has been, for absolutely no reason.

    Either this massive company has had absolute fools in charge of their web dev for decades leaving piles of money on the table due to incompetence… OR they actually just don’t care about making sales for whatever reason. I think that reason is that they exist just to keep the rail experience shitty.

    My secondary piece of evidence is how poor and shitty the actual train service remains after so long in business. Train travel has not gotten better at all in my lifetime, only worse.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      20
      edit-2
      14 days ago

      Destroying amtrak is literally a republican agenda, for the automotive reasons you stated.

      Also, if you can spring for a sleeper car, the experience is fucking amazing. Three meals (and one boozy drink) included a day, there was a wine tasting, just all around pretty rad.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        3
        edit-2
        13 days ago

        I have enjoyed the sleeper cars! I’m a fan of rail travel which is how i know that the user experience hasn’t changed in 30+ years!

        My favorite is the observation cars on the coast starlight.

        The trains are still infrequent, often not to schedule and with minimum available routes. Short hops are far too expensive for the experience you get as well. The only thing keeping Amtrak from working seems to be Amtrak.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      613 days ago

      I do think that Amtrak is purposefully kneecapped to keep train travel from being appealing, but honestly I think their website is fine. It’s on-par or slightly less usable than something like American Airlines’ website

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        1914 days ago

        It’s federally owned. While ops theory is interesting, I think the real answer is because the government runs it and they depend on government funds to operate.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          1014 days ago

          So there’s also not much incentive for the people running the service to do any more than the bare minimum.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          513 days ago

          it’s not federally funded the way most federal stuff is handled though. It’s ‘federally chartered’ and nominally a for profit corporation where all the stock is owned by the feds and the feds choose the leadership. It’s supposed to make money not just spend tax money.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    4214 days ago

    Cats have a much more complex understanding of human behaviour and just consider us harmless and boring enough to not bother.

    As in your cat totally understands that your keyboard is special in a way and you don’t want it disturbed, but couldn’t give two shits about your wants. Or completely being aware of how unpleasant it is when they sit on you with their butthole in your face, but why not if that’s what they want to do right now?

    I think this is real and that most (not all) cats are smarter and more selfish than we think

    • ivanafterall ☑️
      link
      fedilink
      English
      2313 days ago

      Dogs are waaaaay more aware than most people seem to think. I think it’s true of most animals. We just don’t like to think about it.

      • MrsDoyle
        link
        fedilink
        English
        1413 days ago

        I stayed out later than normal one time and missed one of my dog’s walks. He tore up a newspaper while staring at me. Rip, rip, rip. He knew I spent time looking at newspapers so he chose to destroy one, while heavily implying that if I fucked up his schedule again he would rip ME up.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          413 days ago

          LMAO

          As someone who spends more free time with electronics and other more expensive stuff than newspapers, this would cause a big rift between me and my dog.

      • w3dd1e
        link
        fedilink
        1013 days ago

        This. My dog knows words that I didn’t teach him. I know people talk about pattern recognition and what not but that’s not all that different than human knowledge. I learn words by hearing them repeated too

        I know how to read his body language and the tone of his barks to know what he wants. He will even show me, if I ask him.

        I suspect he understands a lot more than I am capable of deciphering as well.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          212 days ago

          My dogs know the difference between going out pants and around the house pants. We also have to say preambulate when talking about walks unless we want to excite the dogs.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        713 days ago

        Dogs brains activate the same regions when the see human faces that activate in our brains. These same regions don’t activate in dogs to anything like the same degree when they see other dogs.

        Dogs are far more in tune with us that they are with their own species.

        Some of the oldest human archaeological sites have dog remains among the humans. Domestication of the dog was going on far far earlier than the first evidence we have for domestication of the first food species.

        We have evolved together as two mutually symbiotic species.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          313 days ago

          These same regions don’t activate in dogs to anything like the same degree when they see other dogs.

          Probably because they use scent more than sight for being in tune with their own species.

          • @[email protected]
            link
            fedilink
            112 days ago

            Sent is just an id for dogs. They use body language with humans and other dogs. They also pay attention to threw same parts of human faces that we do. They don’t do this with other dog faces.

            • @[email protected]
              link
              fedilink
              112 days ago

              Scent is how dogs (generally) primarily experience the world.

              They don’t do this with other dog faces.

              Because dogs don’t use their faces the same way that humans do

              • @[email protected]
                link
                fedilink
                112 days ago

                Dogs use scent more then humans. However they still use sight and sound much morfe then they use scent.

                Dogs use body language and vocalization to communicate with each other. Watch two dogs interact they look at each other and will growl, and bristle or tail wag and play bow to indicate what they want.

                They look at faces on humans because that’s a major component of how we communicate.

                Smell is not how they communicate. It’s just how they know where other animals have been.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        413 days ago

        I agree, but that’s not a conspiracy. Scientifically speaking, we know that animals are smarter than most people admit.

        The conspiracy here is that cats are not just smarter than we think but actually one of the smarter animals in general and they are also very internal and just don’t care about us so they don’t exhibit it in ways that we recognize.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      1014 days ago

      Some cats are extremely smart and very devious (looking at you, mother’s cat) and some are. Well. I love them. But I’ve met cats that absolutely had nothing going on upstairs, not a single thought in their little brains.

      That’s rare though! Most are pretty smart and know how to convince us to do everything for them! And I always will do my best for them.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        English
        413 days ago

        cats that absolutely had nothing going on upstairs, not a single thought in their little brains.

        Ah, so you’ve met a Persian cat. Pretty cats, but at what cost?

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          213 days ago

          Their singing ability was definitely a cost, never let one pick any Bard or Bard adjacent class.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      1
      edit-2
      12 days ago

      I’ve always said that people who think cats are simple or ratty/skittish creatures have never laid with a loving cat on their chest. There are few deeper connections that a good owner and a well-loved cat. They are exceptionally bright animals.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    16
    edit-2
    12 days ago

    Batshit insane conspiracy theories are pushed to discredit all conspiracy theories with actual evidence.


    Women’s pants have small pockets on purpose to increase handbag sales.


    Surveillance of the general public is much, much worse than people believe and the view of being considered weird and paranoid is deliberately encouraged.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      4
      edit-2
      12 days ago

      100% to third one. I posit that’s how they got Luigi (knew where he was basically the entire time imo) and why the actual arrest was so weird and kind of botched

    • Jolteon
      link
      fedilink
      4
      edit-2
      12 days ago

      I 100% believe #2 and #3, but especially the #2.

  • Angry_Autist (he/him)
    link
    fedilink
    4014 days ago

    Microsoft deliberately fucks with your video and audio drivers before a big update so you have to reboot

    This isn’t a conspiracy, it is a proven fact.

    • felsiq
      link
      fedilink
      English
      1313 days ago

      Does anyone have a source on this? It’s 100% believable but I’m not turning anything up and this seems like something worth knowing more about

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      213 days ago

      I think it is more that the update fucks with drivers? As in, updates bring updated stuff that probably interferes with still-running old stuff.

      • Angry_Autist (he/him)
        link
        fedilink
        112 days ago

        If my experience is common, the update ‘pre-loads’ some non-locked system files as time goes on while the update is downloaded but not technically applied by the tool. So these files get changed without a reboot, and while you may not be using them at the time of overwrite, when you next load them, there are subtle incompatibilities with the previous version and your active data.

        Kind of like ‘The dll was replaced by the exe is still the old version’, and this causes a ton of small but annoying glitches, crashes, and odd audio behavior.

        Untill reboot, which happens less and less often now that windows doesn’t bluescreen every few hours.

        My conspiracy is that they are aware of it, and do not change it despite the risks it provides, to keep everyone in line with their update schedule, denying the user the rights to control their own hardware, again.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          112 days ago

          To be fair, the very same thing happens with Linux, when you install updates but don’t restart services (or, god forbid, the whole system). Really weird tiny issues accumulate until I am fed up and hit reboot.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      1213 days ago

      As we all have shared ancestors this would be higly different depending on how far back you go in time.

      Heck, if I go back far enough we all need to eat seafood

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    54
    edit-2
    14 days ago

    Back when reddit had awards, the admins would routinely award posts to make it appear like people were actually buying them.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      22
      edit-2
      13 days ago

      I thought this was common knowledge.

      I got awarded gold by a mod that told me they were gifted a certain number of awards from Reddit to give out (I believe they said they got 15).

      The same mod also claimed that gold-gifted responses were given prioritized visibility.

      • Hossenfeffer
        link
        fedilink
        English
        713 days ago

        Can confirm. I was gifted a bunch of Reddit cash for… er… I dunno, being around for a long time maybe. I spent it on giving gold and silver to posts or comments I enjoyed, but I certainly wasn’t going to spend my actual money on it.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    2214 days ago

    Mine used to be that Bill Hicks faked his death and created Alex Jones in order to sell out. Doesn’t seem very low-stakes any more