So the bluer names are ethnic and the redder names are terrible. Interesting trend.
Having a girl in a red state? You are legally required to end it in “lynn,” “leigh,” “ly” or “ley”.
And start with Oak. Apparently.
Con. Mother: “Let’s name our daughter after a tree. What’s that name people use from a tree that is strong, but bends under pressure so that it never breaks?”
Con. Father: “Oak?”
Con. Mother: “No, that one definitely breaks under pressure. Also, oak is dense. Do you want our daughter to be dense?”
Con. Father: “…Professor Oak?”
Con. Mother: “Oh… It may be inevitable that our daughter will be dense. Let’s go with ‘oak’.”
Missed that - hope I have a good lawyer.
Funny how quick it changed, “lee” ending was for boys and “lynn” for girls.
Specifically ethnicities that tend to have bigger families too.
Three Catholics that used to pump up blue numbers are all conservatives now.
“Dad, what was I named after?”
“I really liked those sunglasses that cops wear, and your mom likes spelling stuff weird to feel fancy, so naturally we called you Oakleigh!”
I have a red state relative who is a big sports fan and names their children after sports equipment manufacturers.
I’d like you to meet my family: here’s my son Champion, my youngest, Addidas, and Riddell is the oldest. 😄
Maybe they can get future sponsorships!
I’ve never really thought about it, but I think it would make it harder for them to get sponsorships.
If your name is Nike, then would Puma really be willing to sponsor you? And if your name is Nike, then you’re already advertising for Nike. Even if Nike did sponsor you, there would be no competition so you wouldn’t be able to negotiate a bigger paycheck.
I suppose a good marketer could spin it. “My name may be Nike, but you’ll only ever see these feet in Asics!”
Someone may want to “steal them away” from their namesake brand too for the same reason. “They’re names after Nikes, but still won’t even wear them for money!”
Advertising is weird. I’m sure if one was a star and companies saw a way to exploit that, both parties would be able to work something out.
Kind of like Harrison Ford advertising for Jeep
Exactly! I forgot about that ad, but they nailed it.
Is it better than Tracker and Hunter and Cooper and Baker as first names?
Four different versions of shitty overpriced sunglasses favored by insecure man children? That tracks.
Ok, but why not name them after soft drinks, cigarettes or some illnesses linked to diabetes?
If these are the popular names now, the world is going to be filled with insufferable twats in 20-30 years.
Stetson? Like… the hat?
Bruh.
I suppose its better then naming their kid Fedora.
The top red girl’s name is Hattie.
Middle name McHatface
IIRC it’s short for Hatherly
Hey now… It was also a Cologne at some point.
My oldest son, Stetson, was picking on his youngest brother, Resistol, until the two middle children, Akubra and Master Hatters of Texas stepped in.
… Miriam is making a come back?
Eustace! Leave that poor dog alone!
And then also… jesus fuck, the right wing 2A crowd is now I guess just naming their kids 4 or 5 different variations of their favorite overpriced ‘cool but also tactical’ glasses?
I guess it makes sense for a Republican approach to daughters; literally just accessories they own so they can self-actualize via consumerism and performative conformity.
… Also I can only hope male Nico just barely making the list is from people who played GTA 4 and actually realized his entire story is a thorough evisceration of the concept of the American Dream.
It’s probably because it’s a traditional Jewish name. It’s just Hebrew for Mary.
Ah, that makes more sense!
Yeah it’s funny to see it thought of as an old person name because when I hear Miriam I picture a youngish Jewish woman.
These aren’t necessarily popular names. They’re the most skewed ones (presumably above a threshold, otherwise there would be a lot of names where there was only one baby).
I know, I know, I’m just being cheeky =P
But, that is a good and accurate thing to point out either way!
Moshe? Kohen? Baylor???
Multiple versions of “Oak”???
I don’t understand these names
Moshe is a traditional Hebrew name. It’s probably pretty much 100% NY and maybe a little NJ. That’s likely why it’s only 3% red when the rest of the most skewed names still have more than 20% in the minority.
Moshe is a Jewish name, Kohen is a fake Jewish name for Christian zionists, Baylor is a Christian college with a football team popular with gambling addicts.
In the Bible the oak of righteousness will not bend, and no matter how many Olive Gardens she’s banned from Oaklynn will never bend from knowing that she wants to see the manager and you’re a slur.
I was thinking Oakley came from Annie Oakley
Has to be Charles Oakley. They want her to grow up to be an enforcer in the WNBA.
Nah its just a brand of sunglasses lol
Next stop: “this is my son, Walmart F-150 McDonaldson.”
It’s weird white people that live in townhomes giving their kids names they think sound Appalachian or folksy.
Lead poisoning leads to some dumb names
I wish that was all the negative consequences it lead to, instead of well…
*gestures broadly*
All those red names remind me of r/tragedeigh on Reddit.
My first thought exactly
If Saylor and Baylor get together, do you think their relation-ship is gonna sink? Or will it be smooth sailing?
Stetson - cowboy hats.
Briggs (& Stratton) - outboard motors.
Oakley (in three different spellings) - redneck eyewear of choice.Conservatives are one generation away from naming their kids shit like Winchester, Remington, Walmart, and Budlight.
Fascinating that in the female category, blue has no names ending with the “ee” sound, and in the red category, there’s no names ending in the “ah” sound.
That really is fascinating. That’s too consistent to be a fluke.
All the red names sound like last names to me
As a non-american, WTF with those red names?!? Those are not first names or even word that exist in others countries/languages? Are they AI generated or what? Poor kids…
To be fair, a lot of names don’t exist in other languages, or at least stay the same across different languages.
I noticed that trend in my red state a while ago. So many Reagans and Jacksons. One time my kid had a Stallone in her class.
How can Mohammad, the most common name on Earth, be 3rd highest and yet McLovin isn’t even charted? 🤔
But also: Give it up for Baylor and Saylor Moon!
In Britain they tend to count the variant spellings as different names - I’ve worked places with so many Mohammeds they went by their middle names.
Similar thing at my job. US-based, but lots of immigrant engineers in my office and some overseas teams too. No shortage of Mohammads, Mohammeds, and Muhammads, plus a few Mahmouds in there for good measure.
Rise of the -leighs, -lees, and -dens.
